It takes hands to build a house, but only hearts can build a home.

Author Unknown

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Chapter 10, Page 9, Book 08

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Habit 5:
Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood

If you're like most people, you probably seek first to be understood; you want to get your point across. And in doing so, you may ignore the other person completely, pretend that you're listening, selectively hear only certain parts of the conversation or attentively focus on only the words being said, but miss the meaning entirely

Covey warns that giving out advice before having empathetically understood a person and their situation will likely result in rejection of that advice


Being a mom I know what it is like to give advice and have it rejected. Maybe the reason I wasn’t always successful had something to do with not understanding exactly what the problem was.

I think that very often I was the one that wanted to be understood, forgetting that to be understood, you have to first understand. I found that many an argument had been started because we didn’t take the time to listen to each other.

I do know I’m getting better at it and very often don’t give advice at all, but I do listen a lot.

Our weather for the next few days is going to be like Indian Summer. The weekend promises to be just beautiful. Thank the good Lord for His many blessings.

One more day of work after today and I’ll be off to the camper !


If you try to put yourself in the other guy's shoes--even for a minute--understanding and compassion will come.

Paul Winfield

‘On Ya’- ma


Joan said...

Hope the weather forecaster has it right for you and you gat a glorious weekend at your camper. Love Joan.

Linda said...

What a great entry. How very true it is! Linda

Hollie said...

You're absolutely right!! I have found that I am a good listener. Most of time people know what they need to do , but they just need someone to be there to listen to them.....

betty said...

maybe that's why the Bible has so many verses about watching our tongue and why the good Lord gave us 2 ears and 1 tongue; I tend to talk more than listen; trying to work on changing that

glad you are enjoying a bit of Indian summer :)


Jenny said...

Oh that is oh so true.
Jenny <><

Beth said...

What a beautiful photo up at the top of your page!


Unknown said...

Well said off to sleep with your thoughts

Linda said...

How very true! I always found the best results with my daughter came if I validated her feelings and opinion before telling her what I wanted her to do. It's hard to always remember that though, and I sometimes didn't!! LOL!

Great post!

Pooh Hugs,

Janie said...

I think I have learned not to talk too much. When I do I am misunderstanding what is being said. lol I think moms kind of have to learn along the way. lol Have a great rest of the week. Janie

Alice said...

Lots of wisdom there. We do need to understand the problem to understand a solution. Sometimes it seems problems don't have a solution right at hand and in time maybe it will. Have a great camping time and roast an extra weiner for me :).........alice