It takes hands to build a house, but only hearts can build a home.

Author Unknown

Thursday, June 30, 2005


Both my parents died without any reconciliation between us. I , their only child, did not live up to their expectations. Nor did they to mine. I wish it had not been so, and they must have felt the same way. The ritual of reunion never happened. The distance between us was so great that I didn't ever attend their funerals.
Robert Fulghlum

Sometimes there are parts of our lives that are unmendable. We cannot always put the pieces of our life back together again. Lost jobs, shattered relationships, loved ones who have died, dreams never brought to birth, and disease, aging or accidents are all situations that cannot be restored.

Although we may not be able to put the old pieces of a situation back togther again we can still mend our spirits.

The Serentity prayer expresses the vital truth - we need wisdom to know when something is unmendable and when it is reparable. We need courage to take the steps to move on with our lives, whether those steps are leaving someone or something behind, or returning to the brokeness and taking action to put the pieces back together.

The healing of our spirit will come when we let go of the past and stop trying to have things as they used to be .

God can give us the wisdom and courage to let go of any old pain or difficulties.

Scripture: Isaiah 43:14-21
Do not remember the former things,
or consider the things of old
I am about to do a new thing;
now it springs forth,
do you not perceive it?

I have 'let go' of most of my former ways of life. There were lots of pieces I could not fix. I've had to build a new lifestyle for myself and with the good Lord's help, today, I'm doing just fine.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference
The Serenity Prayer
I've also seen the ending to that prayer say...
and the wisdom to know it's me.

Today I will let go of one of the pieces of my past that cannot be mended.
'On Ya' - ma

Wednesday, June 29, 2005


How large a cup of tears must I drink, O God?
How much is enough

Ann Weems

Through the ages hurting people have raised their anguished voices to God. They have voiced questions, demandes, accusations and beseeching. They have implored, begged and pleaded with God.

Suffering happens because of our human condition with it's natural life cycle. We hope that God will somehow choose a miracle to perform for us. The prayer style of the Psalms can teach us how good it is to be honest with ourselves as well as with God, and to count on God's healing presence.

God gathers our pains and struggles and holds them compassionately.

Scripture: Revelation 7: 13-17;
Jeremiah 31:1-4
And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes
Rev 7:17
I will turn their mourning into joy,
I will comfort them
Jer 31:13

God is a comforting shelter, a protective refuge. He can heal our pain if we can just turn those problems over to Him. Often I find myself in a tizzy because things aren't going the way I planned. When I say Lord, you have to take care of this , because I can't - He does ! He calms me down and I know that everything will be ok, I know He is in charge !

Today when I use a cup, I will be aware of how
God catches the tears of those who
hurt and holds them with care.
'On Ya' - ma

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Week 4 Day 2 - Summer Bible Study

Are you able to drink the cup that I am about to drink?
Matthew 20:22

Jesus was speaking of the challenge and struggle to live a life of love as he had lived it. He was reminding them that discipleship is no easy following.

Each of our life choices, decisions and actions involve consequences. If we choose to love someone deeply we must be willing to accept that our heart's investment may cost us loneliness and sadness. We will be challenged to accept that person's weknesses as well as that person's strengths. We will bear deep sorrow if they die or leave us without our consent.

With each part of our life we can ask ourselves: Am I willing to accept pain that my investment may cost me? Am I ready to be generous with my commitment even if it brings suffering. Am I willing to walk in the footsteps of Jesus?

Scripture: Mark 8:34-38
If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves, take up their cross and follow me.

I would never change some of the most important choices I've made in my life. I choose to be Catholic when I converted at the age of 21. I choose to marry the most wonderful man I've ever met. We choose to have 7 beautiful children. These were the best choices I've ever made. I've also made some poor choices, ones that I'm still paying for. But I do know they were the wrong ones and I've learned some valuable lessons from them. With the help of our good Lord, I pick up my crosses daily because I'm empowered by the Beloved to accept them and to remember to live one day at a time. With God all things are possible !

Today each time I take a drink , I will say yes to the consequences of my life-choice and decisions.
'On Ya' - ma

Monday, June 27, 2005


The most helpful discovery of today has been that right in the midst of
my sorrows there is always room for joy. Joy and sorrow are sisters.
They live in the same house.
Macrina Wiederkehr

Life will not always be to our liking, there is a natural cycle of the spirit just like earth's cycle of seasons. These seasons come and go in spite of how much effort we might put into having only joy in our lives. Feeling powerless and vulnerable can teach us that we cannot control every aspect of life. Difficult things happen but we know that these things are a part of the life cycle and they will eventually pass. Joy and sorrow are both a part of the process of growth. Each has something significant to bring into our lives.

We must be willing to accept both joy and sorrow.

Scripture: John 12: 20-26; John 16: 25-33
Very truly, I tell you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains just a single grain; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.
You will have pain, but your pain will turn into joy.
To balance the pain I have felt in my life I try to make a celebration of life. Using every opportunity to be thankful and joyful for the blessings I do have. I've become much closer and more reliant on God because so much has been taken away from me.

Joy and sorrow do truly live in the same house. I remember the illness of one of my boys and how sorrowful I was . Sorry because there was absolutely nothing I could do to help him. All I could do was to turn it over to God. But then I was joyful when he recovered. I'll never forget one doctors visit we went to. We were to hear the results of some testing he'd gone through. I think we were both tied up in knots. Then the doctor told us that all the tests were perfectly normal - we sat in his office and listened quietly to all his explanations. When we got outside the office - We were jumping around hugging each other and praising God. Joy ! Pure Joy ! I think any mother could relate to finding out that her son's cancer had not spread to his lungs. As a matter of fact it's been 5 years and he's cancer free ! Praise God !!!

We can be joyful in our sorrow.

May the good Lord help us to receive the experiences life gives us and to trust that He will be our faithful companion who strengthens us during difficult times. May we grow through all the seasons of our life.

Today I will look for and listen to what
joy and sorrow are teaching me.
'On Ya' - ma

Sunday, June 26, 2005


To the holy people she (Holy Wisdom) gave the wages of their labors;
she guided them by a marvelous road, herself their shelter by day --
and their starlight through the night.
Wisdom 10:17

Because we are flawed human beings, we can get side-tracked. We loose our focus and get caught up in self-improvement plans of our own making that have little to do with God's plan for us.

We tend to forget that we have access to a Loving Being who regards us with great tenderness and is always walking with us.

Divine guidance is a source of wisdom for us that helps us to know when to embrace ourselves and when not to give into ourselves. Wisdom helps us to discover each step of the way, how we are to be a loving person in our world with our chipped, flawed condition. Many of the Psalms ask God to show us the way.

We should trust in this wonderful guide who has been given to us. We need this Wise One to teach us how to be and where to go.

Psalm 43:3 O send out your light and your truth, let them lead me.

Scripture: Psalm 16
I bless God who gives me councel,
in the night, also, my heart instructs me.
I keep God always before me.

May we make good choices that are reflective of the loving goodness of God.

Too often I forget to pray for God's wisdom when I make choices. I've already started reading the Psalms more with the hope of strengthening my praise of Him and opening myself to be aware of what He wants me to do for His glory.

I just read this morning about a sign on the wall in St. Teresa's room that went something like this ....In the end is isn't what people want that's important. It is all about God.

Today I will call on Holy Wisdom at least twice during the day and ask for guidance.
'On Ya' - ma

Saturday, June 25, 2005


Inside the Great Mystery that is,
we don't really own anything.
What is this competition we feel then,
before we go, one at a time, through the same gate?

We see and hear all the time constant comparisons and competitions based on what our culture tells us is looking good, attractive, and desirous. People end up rejecting themselves or others because they don't meet the correct standards and qualifications.

In Liberia having a gap in ones fron teeth is a sign of great beauty. Here, we would have braces to correct the situation. It is very difficult to be ourselves and not to be shaped by the expectations of others.

We are not meant to be like everyone else. We should give thanks to God for all we have and are and not give in to false voices of our culture.

If we have two cups that are different are they not both still vessels? Each holds what is poured into it. Each is unique, yet a blessing.

Scripture: Romans 9:19-26
But who indeed are you, a human being, to argue with God? Will what is molded say to the one who molds it, 'Why have you made me like this?' Has the potter not right over the clay, to make out of the same lump one object for special use and another for ordinary use?
We look longingly at the gifts of others and forget or deny our own gifts. When we compare ourselves to others, we should remember and appreciate our own distinct personhoods.

When I was newly married and had no children, I would look at other couples with children and long for a baby of my own. As the good Lord didn't see fit to bless us with one until I was 27 years old, I had quite a few years of wishing I was one of those people with children. People were cruel when they suggested that we didn't know how to do 'it' right and ridiculed us because we weren't able to have children. Well, we were blessed with 7 children and then the same people ridiculed us for having so many. You cannot please people. What you can do is accept what is given to you. If you take the time to count the blessings you have, you won't have time to worry about what you don't have. In the long run, it isn't important what others think about you, it is important to be thankful to God for what He has given you !!!

Today I will not envy others or compete with them.
'On Ya' - ma

Friday, June 24, 2005

WEEK 3 - DAY 4

The dialogue with God, which begins with the confession of one's own failures is not depressing, it is liberating. At last, perhaps even for the first time, we have been honest with ourselves about what we are and we have been honest with the one Person before whom there is no deception.
Emilie Griffin

Because we are human, we sometimes fail. No matter how hard we try we still make mistakes, poor decisions, hasty judgements, and badly choosen comments. Sometimes these are intentional behaviours, other times we just 'mess up'.

God reaches to us the way the way he has always reached human beings , through our ordinary flawed lives. No matter what we have failed at , we need to reach a place where we can forgive ourselves for how we have failed. We need to ask forgiveness of God and and of others if we have harmed them. Then we need to turn with trust to the One who readily and endlessly extends the cup of mercy to us.

Scripture: Psalm 25
Be mindful of your mercy
and of your steadfast love,
for they have been from of old

Through the mercy of God, I have had some very inlightening failures. Failings can teach us so much. My parents tried to teach me things that would make my life easier and better. I tried to teach my children the right things to do too. God, in his Word , has left us with a book of knowledge ( the keys of Kingdom) Yet, we still have to try it our way only to fail and then ask forgiveness. One thing I'm learning is to consult with the Heavenly Father before doing things. In the past, I haven't done much thinking, just acting.

I will greet myself mercifully at least once today.

'On Ya' - ma


This morning I washed my old coffee cup here at work. It was quite stained and needed a good scrubbing. Even with a lot of elbow grease - it's still not spotless.

Just like that old cup my spiritual self needs a good scrubbing sometimes.
As I'm alone so much I can tend to get self-centered . I can loose my temper quickly and when criticized I often jump to my defense rather than look at the other persons side. God gives us that 'scrubbing' in lots of different ways. The plans that are suddenly changed, the dreams that disappear into thin air. I know when I become too full of myself I am 'embarassingly' humbled everytime.
Scripture today - Psalm 51
Today when ever I wash my hands, wash the dishes, or take a shower I will remember that I need spirutal cleansing.
' On Ya ' - ma
* Today is a very shortened version as when I tried last night the blog spot was having technical difficulties. Hopefully I'll be on line tonite with a full version for Week 3 - Day 4

Wednesday, June 22, 2005


Making friends with your shadow helps facilitate your acceptance of yourself as a less-than-perfect human being. We have a dark side;
we are not all light.
William A. Miller

Whatever stands in the light, casts a shadow. Our cups cast a shadow when the sun shines on them. There is an obvious parallel between our shadow and our inner life. Anything in our inner world that is unknown or we refuse to accept is the part of our psyche that is in the dark. It can be self-esteem or the gift of honesty or deep compassion . The shadow can also be negative characteristics that we refuse to believe are a part of us such as stubbornness, greed, jealousy, hatred or self-pity.

Jesus was one of the greatest supporters of getting to know the shadow side of our personality. He was a promoter of truth and pressed others to look and discover their true idenity.

Scripture: Matthew 7:1-5
How can you say to your neighbor: Let me take the speck out of your eye, while the log is in your own eye?

As I find the hidden places of my shadow, may I learn from the unwanted qualities. May I have light to see the underdeveloped aspects of myself and accept what I have refused to believe is a part of myself.

Because of my circumstances I live a pretty serene life. This is what I want to be -- calm and collected. But my inner self is often not that way. I loose my temper quickly and often become defensive when corrected about even minor things. Truly this is a part of me I'd like to have vanish. But, like the shadow, it's still there and I am far from perfect.

Today when I see the shadows,
I wll ask God to help me know and accept them.
'On Ya' - ma

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Week 3 Day 1 - Summer Bible Study

Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people . It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life.
Anne Lamott

We should be reminded that like a beautiful cup with a chip on it, We do not have to be perfect to be loved by God. When we put most of our focus on our faults and flaws, we give most of our energy to them. We lose our perspective and forget our goodness.

Scripture: Psalm 1:39
For it was you who formed my inward parts;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you for I am...wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works.

God never makes junk. We are God's creation - therefore we are truly wonderful. We are on the journey of life, the path to wholeness. Each day is another opportunity to receive God's help and love to become the people we are meant to be.

Today I will not criticize or find fault with myself or others.
'On Ya' - ma

Monday, June 20, 2005

Week 2 Day 6-Summer Bible Study

I lose my center. I feel dispersed, scattered, in pieces. I must have time alone in which to mull over any encounter and to extract its juice, its essence, to understand what has really happened to me as a consequence of it.
May Sarton

As we empty ourselves we have more space in our life for what is truly of value. This space fees us to receive the truths that arise from our deeper selves. Solitude refreshes our awareness of God and of ourselves.

Solitude is not always comfortable and comforting. Sometimes we come face to face with parts of ourselves that we try to avoid or ignore because they hurt or challenge us too greatly.

As we mature on the spiritual path, all our moods and modes are accepted as they are. our solitude helps us to be with God. Give yourself to solitude - God awaits you there.

Scripture: Matthew 6:5-6

But whenever you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your God who is in secret.

I really struggle with solitude because it is what I have too much of. I don't have to shut the door -- no one else is here. True I do have more time to spend praying and studying the Word. I really never thought of this solitude as a blessing of time to spend with the Lord before. My quiet time will be more appreciated in the future. I suppose I've been brought to this space in my life because I needed it and God always has a plan...

Today I will carry my solitude time into the rest of my day. (How true)
I will receive each part of the day from God
'On Ya' - ma

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Week 2 Day 5 - Summer Bible Study

If you trust absolutely, you will always be receptive enough to the signals that life and God and yourself - your deep self - will be giving you . You will always be given the clue, the information, and the inspiration to carry you through.
Andrew Harvey

Emptying asks that we have a willingness to grow. It also asks that you trust God with your life. We will believe that God is for us and not against us. Trusting is the foundation of love.

Is God enough for us. Can we be satisfied with having Him and nothing else. We should want God to be enough and not go seeking things to take the place of this loving Presence in our lives.

Trusting God with our lives can be difficult because we often feel vulnerable. If your experience with others has been wounding, ask God to restore your confidence and let Him be enough for you today.

Scripture - Psalm 56
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.
This I know, that God is for me.

Sometimes it's so hard to trust God with my life. When I'm lonely, frustrated, or hurting I think how good it would be just to have a human being be there to give me that strong 'bear' hug that I need. I do know that I'm never really alone. My God is right there all the time.

I think about how good it was to have my husband take care of the little everyday household problems. If my washer didn't work, he could fix it. If the furnace stopped, he could fix it. Now I'm alone with all these little trivials and I have to hire someone to fix it.

I do find that I go to God in prayer more and more each day. Lord help me to do the right things or speak the right words, or Lord just help me get through this day Because my children are grown and have homes of their own, I can't help them the way I once did, so now I pray for them each day. I pray to God about the little and big things and I glorify his name every chance I get.

May I wait with trust, with patience, knowing You will provide for me . I want for nothing, because You are there. You Lord, are my strong foundation. You are enough for me.
Today I will turn to God , trusting that I will be given guidance and strength.

'On Ya' - ma

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Week 2 Day 4 - Summer Bible Study

Clay is molded into vessels, and because of the space where there is nothing, you can carry water. Space is carved out from a wall, and because of the place where there is nothing, you can receive light. Be empty, and you will remain full...

It is very much easier to give than to receive. When we give we are usually strong and in charge. Sometimes we have to be brought to our knees in order to receive. Events and circumstances of life take over and empty us out. Things like extended illness or divorce, or a loved one's death. When we cannot stand on our own strength, we are being readied to receive. When we are receptive many things such gifts of deeper understanding and a stronger union with God can occur.

At first we may not be receptive, it may frighten us or challenge us. Eventually we learn how wonderful it is to receive and we become more open to receive. At the heart of all the gifts is the treasure of Divine Love, poured out into our emptied, readied hearts.

Scripture: Psalm 81
Open your mouth wide and I will fill it...
I would feed you with the finest of wheat
and with honey from the rock
I would satisfy you

At the time of my darling husbands death he had been without work for over a year. We had 5 children at home and 2 away at college. I worked but in a parochial school making half what other secretaries made - certainly not enough to support a family. Many loving friends from church and school made sure we had a very good Thanksgiving that year. Two days after Thanksgiving my husband died of a massive heart attack. My other half of me was cut off. I had no money in the bank. The unemployment check laying on the table couldn't be cashed by me.
I was totally emptied out.

With out my faith, I don't know how I would have gone on. Family and friends stood by us and people from church supported us that first month. We got so many condolence cards , and everyother one had a $5, a$10 or a $20 in it. I can't begin to express how I felt. I cried, I was so thankful. After that , we began to receive S.S. for the kids and things got a little better. I still had to sell our house and downsize. My youngest son still doesn't care much for pancakes. You see oatmeal and pancakes are the cheapest breakfasts you can fix.A box of cereal costs a lot more. Especially when your feeding 5 growning children. Thankfully the two away at school had room and board provided there.

We found every way we could to save money. I have a better job now and I can support myself pretty comfortably. The kids are all grown and all but 2 graduated from college (they literally put themselves through with very little help from me.)
One of the two non-graduates has a great job without a degree and the other is in the Navy. They've all done very well and God has been sooo very good to me and to them.

Trust in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart - Psalm 37:4

When I was emptied - I was filled .

Gracious Giver you have so much that you want to us to let go of our fears, misgivings and doubts. May we be more open to the out pouring of your love.
Today, when others offer help, I will receive it graciously and with gratitude.
'On Ya' - ma

Friday, June 17, 2005


A door opens in the center of our being and we seem to fall
through it into immense depths which although they are
infinite, are all accessible to us: all eternity seems to have become ours
in this one placid and breathless contact. God touches us
with a touch that is emptiness and empties us.
Thomas Merton

Most of us always want to be filled, to feel good, to have life go well and not have any pain or discomfort. Yet we know that a cup that is full does not have room to receive. Likewise a cup that is never used or shared will grow stale and tasteless
The spiritual path is a constant cycle of emptying and filling, of dying and rising, of accepting and letting go. Emptying can be draining, but it might also be rewarding and satisfying if we have a sense of truly giving to another.

Scripture ~ Philippians 2:1-11
Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God as something to be exploited, but emptied himself...

When I hear the word 'emptiness' I think of my house, empty. Not so long ago it was full--bursting at the seams. So it was emptied, now it's open to being filled again. How? It's full fo memories , it's full of 'stuff', it's full of peace and quiet, and it's full of lots of beds for family when they come to visit. I've been emptied of all the things in life that I once had. Now I must fill up the time I have with new things to do. I do study my bible more, I do pray more, I dabble with painting, read alot and I never have to go looking for a quiet space. I have the whole house - and is it quiet. I have more time to be open to the transforming power of God.
Today I will empty myself of one of my treasures or pleasures, so that I may gain a possibility of being filled with something new .

'On Ya ' - ma

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Week 2 Day 2 - Summer Bible Study

When we pray, how often do we say:
Speak Lord for your servant is listening?
More often, I think, we say :
Listen Lord, for your servant is speaking.
Robert Wicks

God often speaks in whispers.To listen attentively we need to open our minds and hearts emptied of the clutter. Since we are constantly bombarded with noise we often 'tune out' and ignor many noises. Our cup sits silently until we need to use it. We too, need those silient moments to listen . When we give ourselves to attentiveness and deep listening, we find God is everywhere.

Scripture - Psalm 85 : 8-13
Let me hear what God will speak,
for God will speak peace to the people...
to those who turn to God in their hearts
I often ignor God's voice because I think I'm not the one that should be doing a particular thing. I don't feel good enough about my worthyness to even try. I think the only time I recently followed through was to start sending out my daily e-mail and my writing in journals to encourage others. The reward of this was two-fold. I might brighten someone's day , but in turn I'm blessed with some 'good' work
to do which brightens my day !
May God open me so that I will not miss His presence today .
Today, for one hour, I will be attentive to every piece of my life
so that I find God there.
'On Ya' - ma

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Week 2 Day 1 - Summer Bible Study

Our Minds are like crows. They pick up everything that glitters, no matter how uncomfortable our nests get with all that metal in them.
Thomas Merton

We are constantly trying to get rid of physical clutter in our lives. The basket of mail, the desk top, the messy house. We put things away and before we know it --everything is cluttered up again.

Our spirituality gets cluttered too. So many kinds of inner clutter. Anxiety, resentment, self-pity, mistrust, useless fears, have to's and want to's. Anything that keeps us from being aware of what God is offering, is clutter. Even things like knowledge, success, beauty and pleasure can be clutter when we seek these things and they take over our inner life. If my agenda takes over, there is not much room left for God's plans.

Sort through and discard what needs to go.

Scripture: Matthew 6: 19-21
For where your treasure is, there you heart will be also.

The inner clutter that I find the most difficult to discard is my feelings of failure. I never feel like what I do is good enough. I find dealing with the put downs of others very hurtful and burdensome. I'm too fat, I'm too foolish, I'm too ... I need to let it go--empty it out and let God fill me with His love. Just like a cold cup of coffee, we pour it out and fill it up again with some good steaming brew.

May I walk into this day with a deeper awareness of God 's light -
showing me the way.
Day by day I will discard one piece of unnecessary clutter. It takes time to empty what it has taken a life time to collect.
'On Ya' - ma

Tuesday, June 14, 2005


As truly as there is in God a property of truly there is in God a property of thirst and longing. By virtue of this longing in Christ, we have to long for God's response...The property of longing thirst comes from the endless goodness of God...Spiritual thirst will last in God as long as we are to need,
drawing up to God's blisss.
Julian of Norwich
We are rarely completely satisified. Usually we are longing, wishing thirsting for something more.We are often like that empty cup waiting to be filled with whatever we think is missing in our lives. Once we shake loose of the longing for things, our spirit is freed up to thirst for the deeper things of God.
Some deeper thirsts might be
peace of mind and heart
healing of old wounds
acceptance of ourselves
justice for the exploited
discover of who we truly are
harmony with our families and people we work with
wisdome to make good choices
forgiveness of ourselves and others
a willingness to hear God's voice
Scripture Psalm 63
O God, you are my God
I seek you
my soul thirsts for you
my fleshe faints for you
as in a dry and weary land
where there is no water
I will always be in 'want ' of God's kindness and mercy
Today I will deliberately let myself be physically thirsty.
I will let that thirst remind me of my inner thirst for God.
'On Ya' - ma

Monday, June 13, 2005


The Celtic approach to God opens up a world in which nothing is too common to be exalted and nothing is so exalted that it cannot be made common.
Esther de Waal
Like the Celtic tradition that began with the common and ordinary, the cup is very ordinary and a part of common events of the day. We use the cup without every noticing its beauty or how it serves our needs for refresment.
Every part of our lives affects our life with God.
God is dwelling with us everywhere
All of life is is the food of our spiritual growth.
Beware of God teaching you through your life today.
Luke 12:22-31
Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap...yet God feeds them...Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed as one of these.
One way that life has been my teacher is that I've discovered that I need to place my trust in God first, not people. People come and go in our lives, but God is always there. I've also learned that 'stuff' cannot make me happy.
I'm only happy when I am at peace with God.
The Creator and Sustainer of Life is my teacher. May I be more aware and not brush aside any part of my day without being attentive to the truth that it holds for me.
Today I will do something very ordinary
and learn from it.
'On Ya ' - ma

Sunday, June 12, 2005


...I was amazed to learn that butterflies have to spread their wings in the morning sunshine because the scales on their wings are actually solar cells. With out that source of energy, they cannot fly.
Laurie Beth Jones

When we feel unglued, and thangs don't hang together very well we feel that all our energy is draining away and we're unable to contain it.

With out some boundaries it is difficult to establish and stay on a spiritual path. Often little time is left over for our inner selves.

If a cup did not have boundaries on the sides and bottom , it could not hold anything. If we don't have boundaries we can't spread our wings and receive God's energy.

Today take time to think about your spiritual boundaries.


Matthew 14:22-27

And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone...

Too often, I get carried away with the worries and work of the day. Too often I forget that if I leave the burden of the worry with our dear Lord, He'll take care of what I could not possible do. I spend some time with the 'Word' at the beginning and end of each day. I listen to Christain radio and keep studying and reading. I feel that I'm not ever going to be old enough not to learn more.

Dear God, Grant to me the vision to see what may need to be changed and the courage to take a stand for my own time and space. May the quiet time
I spend with you enrich the rest of my day so that I am able to
find you in every part of it.

Today I will set boundaries to protect my time with God.

'On Ya' - ma

Week 1 Day 3

The same stream of life
that runs through my veins
night and day
runs through the world
and dances in rhythmic measures.
Rabindranath Tagore

We are like empty cups until we are filled with the loving energy of God. Once we realize this we'll gain much strength and serenity about our spiritual journey. This is God's doing. Like the woman who touched the hem of Jesus' garment and received the healing power of his spirit, so we need to receive the healing power of His spirit.
Today we should remember that it is God who gives us the power to act and to change.

2 Corinthians 4:5-12
But we have this treasure in clay jars, so that it may be made clear that this extrordinary power belongs to God
and does not come from us.
I have known God's power working in me and through me time and time again. When things have looked so very dark and dismal he renews my
spirit to rejoice and begin again.
Some obstacles blocking the flow of loving energy would be my own fears. Fears mostly of going it on my own. But I am not alone - He is always there by my side. He is in us, our reason for being.
The part of my life that most needs the powerful touch of God is....something I have to ponder on for awhile. I have many needy parts, but which one needs it the most??? I'll be thinking on that one.

Dear God, Remind me often that I can not grow by my own efforts alone. It is your power working through me that creates growth
in my spiritual life.

Today I will remember that I am a vessel of God's tremendous loving energy.
'On Ya' - ma

Friday, June 10, 2005


You are a dwelling place
for the Source of all life.
-Macrina Widerkehr

One of the favorite parts of the day is enjoying a cup of freshly brewed coffee. Especially on a cold winter day when the liquid brings warmth to our bodies. The coffee cup reminds us that containers are meant to hold something refreshing.

We are containers meant to hold the Divine Presence. God dwells within us. In John 15:4 Jesus says 'Make your home in Me.' The Holy Spirit is here within us. We rush through the days forgetting that God is in us. We need to take time to be aware of how God travels with us.

John 15: 4
Abide in me as I abide in you.
I Corinthians 3:16
Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in You.
I am most aware of God's dwelling within me when I go to Communion each Sunday

He renews and refreshes me.

As I reflect on the Divine Presence dwelling with my self and others, I hope that I never show disrespect in any form to myself and others. That what I do or what I say only shows the Love of God in me.

Dear God, you have tended and nutured me and enriched my spirit.
You have surrounded me with your Love.

Today I will place my hand on my heart and remember that God dwells within me.

'On Ya' - ma

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Summer Bible Study

Since I've started 2 journals and since I'm doing a Summer Bible Study and need to journal for that, I've decided to make this journal my 'Study' journal --

Day 1

You are a love song
beauty set to music
You are a love song
I have chosen you
-Theresa Hucul

God created each one of us out of Love. We are beauty set to music. We are one of a kind, uniuqe. We are meant to be a light of love to others.

Isaiah 43:1-7
I have called you by name
You are mine
You are precious in my sight
and honored, and I love you

When I think about God loving me unconditionally as I am I feel so blessed. I don't know of anyone else that loves me for who I am. I know that I'm loved because I'm a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend...but If those titles were taken away, maybe God would be the only one who cared. I've had friends that leave , a husband who died , children that all left home (they were supposed to) I am alone most of the time , but not really, because I am loved by God.

We are using a cup during our study and when I reflect on the Cup of my Life I know that I have love and goodness in me, I just need to be reminded once in a while. The cup is a symbol our our unique self. All cups have a special shape and size just like a person does. The cup is a good container, no matter who uses it. It is of value in itself.

Lord, let me not doubt my value or question my worth. Help me to know and accpt who I am. I am yours. May I bring life to my world.

Today I will try to be a love song for others.

'On Ya' - ma

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Up later than I should be...

Though our feelings come and go,

God's love for us does not.

My cable internet provider was down for a couple hours this evening and I couldn't get on line earlier. Naturally, I couldn't go to bed without writing in my journal. It's be come a habit. If I were wise I'd journal with paper and pen so my children could read all about it someday...ha ha. I don't think any of my words will be immortilized.

Grandma Quote for Today
Every family has its own rhythm,
and if you dance with your children,
that rhythm will become a part of them
and they will never forget it.
Geoffrey Holder

Love always eases the Pain.
Sharing Happiness can become a way of life.
'On Ya'

Tuesday, June 07, 2005


His JOY is in those who reverence him,
those who expect him to be loving and kind.
Psalm 147:11
I just finished taking a test ! Online ! As everyone has heard, our Church has had some major problems with abuse. So now anyone that volunteers in any capacity has to take a course on 'Protecting God's Children' . So far I've completed 22 lessons and just completed the test to recertify. There is a lot to be learned in these lessons. Everyone would benefit from them.
My 2 long days are finished for this work week. Hopefully no more OT -2 10 hour days was enough. Tomorrow I have the last of our prayer group meetings until the fall. Everyone is 'breaking' for summer. Since a couple of my friends and I miss the Bible Study, we're doing one of our own again this summer. Working around everyone's vacations isn't easy, but we found a book to guide us and will study and journal and then meet a few times for dinner in the park and discuss what we've read.
Thank the dear Lord for friends and family ! If I didn't have someone to talk to once in awhile, I'd become stagnant...not one of us does well alone all the time. I'm already much too spoiled by doing what I want when I want most of the time.
Grandma Quote for Today
Never fear spoiling children by making them too happy.
Happiness is the atmosphere in which all good affections grow.
Ann Eliza Bray
If we can't increase ours skillls, expand our knowledge and enlarge our soul,
what is the point of growing old?
'On Ya' - ma